My manager started like this "Hi, I am Madhu, Married with two kids

"My manager started like this "Hi, I am Madhu,

Married with two kids" "Will you hang that calendar or

else I'll HANG MYSELF" "LIBRARIAN SCOLDS,

"IF YOU WILL TALK AGAIN , I WILL KNEEL DOWN OUTSIDE"

"Chemistry HOD comes and tells us...

"My aim is to study my son and marry my daughter".


"Tomorrow call your parents especially mother and father".

"Why are you looking at the monkeys outside when

I am in the class?!" "Lab assistant said this when my

friend wrote wrong code.. "I understand. You understand.

Computer how understand?? "Seeing the principal passing by,

the teacher told the noisy class.. "Keep quiet,

the principal has passed away". Once Teacher Told

"If you Talk So Loudly I Will Stand Uping you"

Teacher to students: Don't spit outside,

the understanding people will suffer.


................................

Beggar: Sir please give me Rs. 10 For coffee

Beggar : Sir please give me rs. 10 For coffee.

Man : Coffee?

Its rs. 5 only.

Beggar : 1 for my girlfriend!

Man : Wow! you too made a girlfriend?

Beggar : No sir, girlfriend made me a beggar.



.........................................

Wife vs Husband

Wife: You delivered an excellent speech.

Husband: Thanks, dear, but the audience was full of fools and idiots.

Wife: Hmm...so, that explains why you addressed them as

BROTHERS and SISTERS.

..................................

Need a Help

Boy: *calls 911* Hello? I need your help!

911: Alright, What is it?

Boy: Two girls are fighting over me!

911: So what's your emergency?

Boy: The ugly one is winning.


.....................................

In college days.. She came into my life ..

In college days..

She came into my life ..

I kept looking at her.

She smiled..,

Yet I kept quiet..

She began 2 speak..,

I dint listen - And

when she began 2 leave..

I started running behind her requesting . . . .

Mam' mam' mam attendance!



..............................................

One day an employee came in to work with both of his ears bandaged.

One day an employee came in to work with both of his ears bandaged.
When his boss asked him what happened, he explained:

"Yesterday I was ironing a shirt when the phone rang
and I accidentally answered the iron instead of the phone!"

"Well," the boss said, "that explains one ear, but what about the other?"

"They called back!


................................................

Medical & Engineering College Principals

Students Guts Medical & Engineering College Principals argued that their students are fearless.

Medical college Principal called the students & asked to jump in a sea full of sharks.

They Jumped..

Principal said: "See the guts"

Engineering College Principal called the students & told them to jump.

They said "Pagal hai kya Takle?"

Principal said: "See the guts"

..............................